Week #what? – Guiding light

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So, remember my comb?

Well, we took another cruise September 5-10, this one out of New Orleans.  (I brought two combs – just in case.)  The second night we were far into the Gulf, and I was feeling lost.  The cruise ship was great, the entertainment was plentiful and varied, the food was delicious, I’d already gotten a ton of great pictures, and the next morning we’d be pulling into Cozumel for tourism and shopping, the morning after would be a tour of Chichen Itza where I could clap my hands and hear the call of the quetzal bird in the echo from the steps… but I was lost.  We were on the water, far from land – the surface below my feet was unstable.  The horizon was distant and monotonous.  Clouds and lightning were following us through the Gulf, it seemed, and of the few stars I could see through the light pollution of the ship… I didn’t recognize.  I had no idea where I was, even though I knew where the ship was going.

Late in the evening of that second day, I was hanging out in the hot tub, gazing horizonward at the lightning reflecting off the clouds above and the water below, hearing the thunder growl across the Gulf.  I caught a glimpse of stars overhead, where we were sailing out from under the storm, and when I got out of the hot tub I walked to the rail.  There was a spot – a fairly narrow, specific place – between the ship lights where a person could look out and let the eyes adjust to the darkness beyond.

I searched skyward.  I just needed one, some sparkling bit of light that I recognized, a familiar friend whose name I knew.  Some bright little piece of home that would tell me where I was, give me some sense of position and distance and permanence.

The clouds cleared, ever so briefly, and I found Cassiopeia.  A five-star constellation in the shape of a “W” who lives in the northeastern sky.  And as my eyes fastened on her, I breathed out and felt my whole being relax.  I knew where I was.

I knew where I was.

Cassie led me to the Big Dipper – which was so low on the horizon the two bottommost stars of the bowl were hidden – which led to the Little Dipper and Polaris, the North Star.

Lightning and the Little Dipper

Lightning and the Little Dipper

It reminded me of some things I’d learned in the MKMMA.  Every single one of us has a gift, a special, unique talent that sets us apart, a piece of our deepest selves that we are obliged to share with the world because nobody else can offer what any individual does.  I’ve been struggling for months to find mine.  I don’t know what makes me jump out of bed at eyes’ opening, eager to get started with the day.  I don’t know what I feel passion for.  I don’t have a guiding light.

But I do know why it’s important.  And I know how I can figure out what drives me.  But the answer, whatever it is, won’t be an easy, knee-jerk response.

Because the trouble is, the reason so many folks live that life of quiet desperation is that they either can’t answer the question, or they answer it using a source outside themselves.  When asked about their guiding light, many cite their religious beliefs; many others, their children.  But an internal compass has to point to a lodestone within, a deep-seated desire of one’s own devising; else as a solid reference point, a star to steer for, it will fail.

The MKMMA didn’t define for me where my passion lies.  That’s not what it’s for.  It did give me the tools I need to find it for myself.  And when I finally discover what that special gift is, that unique talent, that spark of originality the world needs for me to share…?  Like the moment I spotted Cassiopeia, I’ll know.  My entire being will breathe out in relaxation, because I will know where I am, and where I’m headed.

The MKMMA is not for everybody.  Counting how many paths there are to a single destination would be an impossible task.  But it is a way, one that’s been well-thought, practiced, refined, and simplified.

What’s your guiding star?  Would you like to find out?

Sign up for a scholarship here

 

Week #25 – Flying, not solo

OshKosh Airshow-4-2

What a wonderful week it’s been!

(Yes – so completely doing the continuation!  How no-brainer is it for me, that I can get unlimited access to the webbies so far, the webbies in the future – when I might need or want reminding, or a perspective outside my own – maintain exposure to the Alliances, contact with mah peeps, so, so, soooooo worth it!  And yes, will be transferring to a hosted blog next week so as to be able to employ the list-building and all that goes with it.  Looking forward to some reorganization of this blog – certain aspects of it are starting to chafe and irritate.)

So, this week.  I’ve visited prior MasterKeys – the whole of MK-1, with its explanation of the world within and how we manifest what we are thinking made me focus on both how and what I had been thinking for the past month or so.

I’ve a friend, who is currently frustrated with her life and how she has not managed to manifest her dream over the course of the past twenty-thirty years or so; she is convinced now that the Law of Attraction is total bunk, and denies that there are any laws at all – she thinks of them now as codes.  Code of attraction, code of gravity, code of ethics.  Her assertion is that there are (or were, rather) people working at Target who were happy and intended to retire there who are now laid off, and how could they possibly have attracted that when they were happy right where they were?  The Law of Attraction is nothing more than the Catholic guilt, magnified, she says; how could it not be, when it tells us we are responsible for everything that happens to us?  And as for laws, how can something be a law (like gravity) and therefore immutable, unchangeable, universally applicable, when different conditions of these so-called laws are found on different planets?

I bit my tongue and didn’t argue – there’s no way I would.  She’s a soul farther along in development than I am, so it’s entirely possible she has a more accurate view.  Just thought about it for a bit, and tucked it away in mind for consideration at a later date when I’ve developed neurons capable of thinking about the notion.

But that conversation with her and the re-read of MK-1 reminded me that focus determines reality; and I’ve been misfocused the past month or so, even as I was thinking that I had myself all together.  I’ve gone and manifested some lack in my life through the subconscious belief that I ‘didn’t deserve’ the great life I have, the nagging notion that I should/ought/am obligated to do/be/have more, since there’s no way my writing and the photography of sunrises, bugs and flowers that I enjoy can possibly be a service to others (MK-2, “Our difficulties are largely due to confused ideas and ignorance of our true interests”).  That because I love my time freedom there’s something wrong with me, since most people don’t have that and I therefore shouldn’t be enjoying myself… doesn’t that sound idiotic when I write it out?

Haanel even said that a writer’s service is their writing, their gift that they share with the world.

So, back to work on the old blueprint – ’cause I’m sure that’s where the self-sabotage is coming from.  (And I know this system works – I even helped Jerry manifest something he wanted by giving him a card to read aloud several times daily with excitement, enthusiasm and confidence – “The trip through Manitoba’s probate system was swift and easy, and my sibs and I are splitting 1/3 of the total royalties every month.”)  I’m reading the blueprint builder now at sunrise; I get to my spot about ten minutes early, set up the camera, and just stand quietly until the minute of, enjoying my inner Silence.  I take my dawn photos, loving every minute of it, playing with  camera settings – did you know you could make a sunrise look exactly like a sunset, in-camera without any access to tinkering software? – and then do my first reads of the morning, including the blueprint builder.  There’s something more… immediate, a deeper connection, between my subconscious and the words I speak in that moment.

Kind of makes me wonder whether I’ll be able to switch to something else once this year of sunrise photos is done, or if I’ll be so in love with the dawn that I just keep doing it, only from different spots that showcase different aspects of sun and earth and water!  (Sunsets are next, by the way.  And then probably birds – I can find a bird to photograph every day of the year, I’m sure of it.  Love birdies.  They move so fast, though!  After that… hm.  Don’t know yet.)

Anyway.  Last thought of the week – I’m still a work in progress; I still get impatient and sometimes critical, but knowing that I am responsible for everything I do, think, say and feel – and for the conditions I manifest in my life – is a tremendous, energizing freedom.