Master Key Experience – Week 4 – Helpful Thoughts

Between my job, taking care of Jerry as he recovers from heart surgery, and working my business, it’s hard to find the time to devote to the reads and the sit. I know they’re important. I understand the logic in sacrificing some of my business hours – because, frankly, that’s literally the only time I have available since I have no hobbies and don’t watch TV right now; both of those would eat into the few hours I have for building my business to profitability – for the growth of the world within. Just knowing that doesn’t make it easy.
And it’s even harder to see the list of things I don’t accomplish, day by day, getting longer and longer until it eats up my weekends. And yet somehow I have to manage my priorities so that I fit in the reads and the sit and the homework and the chore (oh, yeah. We’re supposed to call it a ‘service’ now. Gods, I detest that word! I have a better ad more positive emotional connection to ‘chore’ than I do to a word that was once habitually used to guilt me into doing things I didn’t want to do). I’m always tired. I go to bed groggy, I wake up groggy, I don’t want the night to be done because if it is I have to get up and do things. When does the payoff come? When will all the sacrifice I’m making of the fun things to do what’s necessary to have the future I desire turn into more freedom instead of less? When will I finally feel happy and energized to wake up, because the day is filled with things I love to do instead of the ones I have to do in order to survive?
I have no answers yet.
But I had a thought this week as I was reading Og. The phrase “today I begin a new life” doesn’t actually refer to the weeks, months, and years stretching out ahead of us. That new life is today. It’s always ‘today.’ And today is always new. Today is always a chance to start over, be a little better than I was yesterday, prioritize more effectively, accomplish more of the important things, be more forgiving of what I don’t get done.
And I’m a little surprised by the realization. When I used to have spare time, I wrote science fiction, and my main characters come of a race who see all times as ‘now.’ So they don’t usually get worked up about past or future, because we are only ever in the present. Sure, the choices we make moment to moment build our future, but that takes care of itself if we make the right decisions in the now.
And ‘today’ is always ‘now.’
Today I start a new life.
In the ever-changing now, I choose. And I can be whatever I will to be.

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